THE SUN CHILD.
[Amsterdam, 2015]I.
I swayed –
The grime bellowed out from my core
Green eyes;
Dirty green palms
Bitter like ginger
Gnawed at my taste
I was tied to this pole
With gold –
Twenty four karat shining beaming
Handcuffs
Twenty four hours
Staring wishing screaming
GOLD
Rope laced round my neck
Laced round my ankle
Laced round
Dirty green palms
Gnawed at gold
Rope
Staring wishing screaming
The grime bellowed out from my core
Handcuffed these dirty green palms
And tethered
This neck
With
Gold
III.
a.
Plush pink lips
Passed down the sweet hissing
In my left earlobe
Vibrations plucked
And my chest expanded
Around the world
I was at the edge of
Broken pines
And soft angels
With an electric pay phone
Gentle taps patted
Cocoa hues
Numbness teasing with explosion
And I sat
In the
Throne
b.
Pines broken
Teasing numbness
I was at the edge of
The world
With an electric pay phone –
Cocoa hues
Passed down the sweet hissing
Of plucked vibrations
Soft angels expanded my chest
The throne exploded
Gentle taps
Patted plush pink lips
Left in my
Earlobe
VI.
Lately it was harder for her to move from bed to room, room to world.
She had been up late talking – hours on the phone running in circles from “I love you” to dead silence... dead silence that led to crying – empty dead silence.
The broken clock ticked obnoxiously, a reminder that time was passing, life was moving, and yet she remained in bed. Not asleep or awake, but rather somewhere in between.
Outside distant pops echoed in the distance; they felt like violence.
Some nights she could rise slowly to sneak down creaky steps, find herself hidden on the back porch. A glass pipe filled with green spells as she fell into a daze that lifted her to memories.
She would hum here – old jazz standards or his lullaby. Slipping into old tunes while smoke drifted forward then disappeared into the atmosphere.
VIII.
Last night I dreamt
In Black
And when I woke the world was shaking
There was no sun
For four days
And I could not speak
I could not move
Last night I woke
In a puddle of nails
Drenched with pain
Gasping for you
Woken by death
And its fair warning
When I dream in Black
It wraps me round
And when I wake
My ground is
Shaking
When I wake my palms are
Shaking
When I wake my time is
Shaking
And there is no one
They advise against
Returning home
But my safety is never certain
So if I die before the New Year comes
I will die in Black dreams
In my father’s eyes
I will die in the world
Shaking
IX.
By the time I was lost in dance
The sun came out
When I left your home it was misting
Clouds hanging in my ears
But by the time I was lost
The sun came out
My body was your vessel
Collected from our spilled mass
And I was
Dancing
Lost in this sun
Lost in this dirt –
Lost in your hands
I shook as you shifted
In my Black body of Gold
And you beckoned for my gleaming
While I was lost in dance
Lost in my dreams
And the sun was hot
Kneading my skin like God’s palms
Too warm for touch
And elusive to your tongue
I was shaking to my son
Shaking the beat of
Our past
And the sun was blazing
Blazing so warm
I was roasting
Too much heat
On my thick leather back
And so I kneeled
Closed my eyes to find
Peace
Closed my eyes to find
Life
My eyes were closed so tight
I could finally see
Blackness
Kneeling in motion
To the West
Kneeling in
My womb
Of truth
Kneeling in dreams
By the time I was lost in dance
Your bullets did not phase me
My spine lengthened,
Body spread wide
And I was bullet proof
Swinging through fire
Saluting my sun
And lost in a dream of
Black Gold
Your bullets could not phase me
For I was lost in Dance
Lost in Dance with the son at my back
And your fire
Just a flicker of madness
In the distance
Poking at my hip, perhaps,
But I was lost in Dance
And that metal did not phase me
Your bullets did not phase me
Your fear did not phase me
You did not phase me
For I was lost in Dance
And dreams
And you were
Lost
In
Hatred
That bullet slid past
Woven skin
Brothers and Sisters sewn
Into the Black Mass of Gold
A Black Mass that is not destroyed
A Black Mass that breathes –
O’ Brilliant Black Mass.
To you
We were bleeding
But you had been
Blind
For centuries
Trying fruitlessly
To remove a Sun
That lies within
Keep losing me,
Oh I pray
For I will be lost in
Dreams and Dance
And our Son will Come